X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Another X-Men movie…
I’m excited. I love the X-Men franchise. I watched the X-Men cartoons when I was little, read some of my brother’s X-Men comics, played with the X-Men video games, etc. The X-Men are, as you’ve probably realized by now, some of my favorite superheroes. And that love is what enables me to ignore the critics. Most of whom have been cutting the movie apart, describing how pointless and boring it is.

DISCLAIMER: I haven’t seen the movie yet END OF DISCLAIMER! but I intend to, regardless of how many articles tell me it’s not worth seeing. The trailers look good, the cast is great, and I’ve heard from friends that it was a great movie. The critics whine and complain that there’s no point, no story – that it’s just a bunch of guys cutting each other up.

Doesn’t this all sound familiar? Anyone see “Taken” with Liam Neeson? I heard that it was a movie devoid of story. That it was nothing more than a film to showcase how fast and messily a man can kill a group of baddies. They were sooo wrong.

There was a story: A Father, against his better judgment, allows his daughter to go to France with a friend. While in France, the daughter is abducted and the father gets to listen to it over the phone as it’s happening. He then has to go rescue his daughter. That’s the bare description of what “Taken” is all about. And it was fantastic. It was a suspenseful, edge of the seat, “Oh my god, how could that happen?” kind of movie.

But I think these movies have something in common…Something that few people have pointed out in their negative reviews. These are ACTION films, not dramas. These movies are not meant to draw out the minor details of the inner most conflict hidden within the deep recesses of — blah blah blah. They’re meant to show you, hey, this guy’s hurting and he’s gonna make everyone else share his pain.

We’re not discussing the situation in these films. We’re not trying to offer some long, therapeutic spiel full of hidden answers that would solve our heroes problems if only they had listened…and I mean really listened.

But I guess my words still have time to come back and bite me in the ass. Regardless, I’ll still go see “X-Men Origins” and I’ll go in expecting to enjoy myself. If I come out and have a revelation that all these pissy critics were right and maybe they’re not really quite so pissy, then I’ll post my disappointing review here and apologize to all those stuffy critics.

But if, as I expect, the movie turns out to be really good, then I’ll be back with the reasons to back up my opinion that movie critics are stuck-up, pretentious geezers who think they’re much too deep for the rest of the world to fully understand.

So until then… Here’s some silly little reviews to hold you over:

  • If it weren’t for the claws…
  • X-Men goes nowhere

    And allow me to entice you with a quote from the latter:

    The movie is called “Origins,” and we already know Wolverine’s future: “X-Men,” “X2″ and “X-Men: The Last Stand.” Even an adamantine bullet couldn’t erase the memory of those movies.

    And if you’ll excuse me, I’ll just make one minor little correction: it’s alloy adamantium, not adamantine. If you’re not a fan and you hated the first three movies, why bother to see this one and then write a nasty review?

    I guess the critics are right after all, I’ll never understand these people.


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